Alas, one of my favorite redheads has disappeared into the corn fields thus closing the book cover on one of the Clubs greatest era’s. Deans (scroll down) rookie years saw the likes of Pasadena Rugby greats Tom and Dan Boyle, Rob Ingles, Noah Ballard, Garrett Futrell and Michelli Scottybelly. What, why you ask? So young, what gives? Prior to being taken out playing for the Blue All Star team by this evil bastard, Dean was looking to have the greatest season of his career. His field spacing and awareness had developed, his boot becoming golden, tackling consistent and could hit the center gaps like Aston charging to the front of the buffet line at the Golden Palace. The reason? He will say it was his knee reconstruction. I say bullshit. I’ve seen players come back stronger and faster because the rehab forced them to build the strength and slowly improve the joint. Patrick Caraher, arguably the best #9 the Club has ever seen, played on 2 glass knees for years. Golden Spike recipient Tim Riesen did too. In fact when they just finally lost all soft tissue in his knee and his ability to cut because his knee just swelled to the size of a volleyball he would just tote around a vile of Cortisone and shoot up on the sideline and crash the gaps. Guy was fucking insane, balls bro. I say man the fuck up Dean Damouth. Rugby is a game of fitness and skill but more than anything else it is a mental game. Dean I say it is all in your head. Do you really want your last memories of rugby to be playing for an all star squad of the misfits of Division 3? Division 3 dude. LAME. You quit like the others before you for the worst reason of all. You quit because it’s easy. Fuck you, put down the nachos and the bong, hit the track and get your ass back in #15. You owe it to yourself to rehab and quit on better terms. Playing for YOUR rugby club against real competition. If you do not, you will forever carry this shame and I will make it my personal mission to make sure you always remember this. It’s because I love you. Pussy.
In other news, Week 3 began much like Week 2. So far my only criticism is there is WAY too much coaching of skill going on. It’s a struggle to talk shit over all this instruction. That and apparently our new “field” is a great space for fitness. Who needs a pub close to the pitch when you get a free buzz from oxygen depletion while your lungs struggle as they fill with dirt and asbestos. Ahh the Pasadena Black Lung. Makes me nostalgic for Victory Park.
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
One more time?
Well shit here we go… another rugby season. Where has the time gone? Seems like just yesterday I was nose deep in stripper underwear donated to the club by French Armenian superstar Avo (he gouged me in the face with his thumbnail once during practice and I almost died from dysentery). Avo (also former EAGLE ROCK team mate of our very own Dr. Coach Michael Bryant Esq. Etc) was one of those guys who you could smell from across the pitch, who inexplicably was always sweaty and greasy. When he wasn’t running around gouging team mates in the cheek with his talons and shoving used hooker underwear in your face, was on the side line smoking or trying to shove hooker underwear in your face. He also referred to himself in the 3rd person which is always more creepy than awesome. That was a long ass time ago and I bet there is only 2 or 3 guys left in the active club who know who I’m talking about and know that none of this is an exaggeration. Looking back on the whole thing seems like a blur uhh slur. So many years, so many players, so many different types of teams. For me it’s spanned from the mid 90’s with Australian ledged Shaun Kingston (he owned 2 shirts, 1 hat and a Belmont Shore warm-up he stole- he once shat on Lisa Tanners coffee table) to the legendary doldrums of the 3rd division with LaVerne’s own Bobby Ingles and Irish Megastars Brothers Boyle to the undefeated Division champions helmed by James “Golden Thumb”, “No I’ve never been to a strip club before” Macintosh to last year which I think will go down more for what didn’t happen (holding onto the ball, winning) than what did (dropping the ball, not winning).
4 months doesn’t seem like long but in rugby years it’s almost 12… which means I‘ve played rugby on Pasadena for 231 years, which also happens to be the same year Joe Wilson was last considered spry (only one of those is true, you choose). A lot has happened since April. We sent one of our own overseas to learn the finer points of animal husbandry. Word on the street is he’s picked up some new skills and can smell a virgin goat from ¼ mile up wind… good news for Tyler- competition breeds innovation. The rugby gods can be loving and cruel. Over the summer they took 2 long time members Rooney and Frazier as well as 2 core new members Brecheisen and Wolf. Who knows what they will give us back? Will they drop off 4 more who can fill the void left? Only time will tell and if I’ve learned one thing on a rugby club its been never to underestimate the deuchbaggery of your teammates which is why I hope a not too small payback to ask the gods for is to give Sloan the ability to hold onto the goddamn ball like he holds onto his wallet when it comes time to buy me more Stella. 4 months is a long time indeed. Some played make-believe rugby, some pumped irorn and pushed their cars around parking lots for extra quad burn, others like myself hunkered down and did something useful like pop Porpecia like Tick-tacks and pick up work as a rodie for Don Dokkin (also worked on perfecting my power-stance but more on that later).
The Duche and Snake had a big night
What will happen? I’ve received word from the front line and it’s not pretty. New EC members Seamus, Pett and Encinas? Jesus, what good can come from this? Do you know what else sounds like a good decision? Rugby tour 09’ in Hati. This EC really comes as no shock to me. Pett and Encinas collectively have the balanced intelligent decision making prowess of the pet rock my son likes to shove in his diaper. And Seamus? Good lord, if that EC wants to get anything accomplished I hope he brings his trainer with him to blow the whistle and toss him the occasional sardine. At least Hettermann stopped referring to himself in the 3rd person because he doesn’t’ have the charm of tossing used hooker underwear around to make up for it. This really is not shocking though. I’ve found that when left to its own decision making power, 9 times out of 10 a rugby club will make the wrong decision. Shit, I was voted president like 10 times then replaced with Rooney. I still can’t figure out which is dumber. This is what happens when you let rookies have a say in anything. I mean these are guys who couldn’t sing the refrain to a single verse of S&M man on the bus.
ME: OK, this is how it goes, me and Aaron will sing a verse then you sing the refrain. It’s really easy, we’ll pick some classics. Got it? OK, here we go… Who can take a chain saw?!”
GILBERT: “Who?”
ME: “…. can take a chain saw?”
GILBERT: “…………” (blinks eyes)
ME: “OK.. start over…Who can take a chain saw?!”
GILBERT: “Who?”
ME: “... can take a chain saw?”
GILBERT: “…………” (blinks eyes)
ME: (sighs…. considers jumping out of bus). “OK, Look lets try another one, just repeat what I say and do…. Today’s Monday!....”
GILBERT: “Today is Saturday”
ME: Looks left, sees Michael Bryant sipping white wine….“Swanny- let me have a hit of that”
Well maybe not all of the clubs decisions are bad ones because as much as I’m not looking forward to spending more time this year in San Louis Obispo dodging punches from red neck horse fuckers, I sure as hell am happy I won’t be at Stonhurst Park getting chased by livestock and thugs. My new brand of preferred rugby thuggary has grown much more refined. I’ll take leg tattoos over mutton chops any day of the week.
Well, the die is about to be cast and less I leave you without further alienating myself from those who will decide how much fun I have actually plying this year, I’d like to leave you with some clairfications from an excerpt from Dr. Coach Dr. Michael Bryant Ext previous e-mal. Look, if loving too much is a crime I guess I’m guilty. Here you go....
1. He is uber-organized
FACT: Michael alphabetizes the cleaning products in his house and already laid out tomorrow’s outfit. This isn’t that funny because it’s true
2. He is in pretty good shape
FACT: This is why his preferred brand of leisure wear is awkwardly bereft of sleeves.
3. He is anal compulsive:
FACT: To me this sounds like something completely different that I think he meant and frankly a little messy for a guy who cleans both before and after his house keeper comes (also true- once I caught him combing his front yard grass.). I think he meant anal retentive (probablly the oopposite of compulsive) however I think the Freudian slip may have been the most awesome thing he has done. Well played sir.
4. He is demanding
FACT: There is never a point 4.
5. He was a back for most of his rugby career
FACT: When I first read this I thought it said he was Black for most of his rugby career . Of courts would be FALSE.
6. He does not know a lot about forward play
FACT: Ask Michael which is the tight side prop and time his answer.
7. He is pretty stubborn:
FACT: This is why he will never admit to being even slightly amused by this blog.
8. He does not handle alcohol well:
FACT: I once saw Michael Bryant consume his weight in warm beer somewhere in the back woods of Virginia. In perfect baritonee he then proceed to croon for the women folk of the party. We were also drinking moonshine out of a preserves jar and later some dude in a wheel chair helped me escape from a band of local gang members in a place called Hati.
9. He spent a million dollars to make his house look exactly the same:
FACT: It was slightly under 2 million so my first figure of “millions” may have been an exaggeration for effect. Also the roof is slightly a different shade of terracotta so it's not exactally the same.
10. He has pretty thick skin:
FACT: If he sees a fire on the plaines, he will run over and stomp it out.
11. He cares an awful lot about this team:
FACT: Which is why he will often be herd shouting “GO ROCK!”- he knows we are motivated by hate.
OK, see you on the pitch.
4 months doesn’t seem like long but in rugby years it’s almost 12… which means I‘ve played rugby on Pasadena for 231 years, which also happens to be the same year Joe Wilson was last considered spry (only one of those is true, you choose). A lot has happened since April. We sent one of our own overseas to learn the finer points of animal husbandry. Word on the street is he’s picked up some new skills and can smell a virgin goat from ¼ mile up wind… good news for Tyler- competition breeds innovation. The rugby gods can be loving and cruel. Over the summer they took 2 long time members Rooney and Frazier as well as 2 core new members Brecheisen and Wolf. Who knows what they will give us back? Will they drop off 4 more who can fill the void left? Only time will tell and if I’ve learned one thing on a rugby club its been never to underestimate the deuchbaggery of your teammates which is why I hope a not too small payback to ask the gods for is to give Sloan the ability to hold onto the goddamn ball like he holds onto his wallet when it comes time to buy me more Stella. 4 months is a long time indeed. Some played make-believe rugby, some pumped irorn and pushed their cars around parking lots for extra quad burn, others like myself hunkered down and did something useful like pop Porpecia like Tick-tacks and pick up work as a rodie for Don Dokkin (also worked on perfecting my power-stance but more on that later).
The Duche and Snake had a big night
What will happen? I’ve received word from the front line and it’s not pretty. New EC members Seamus, Pett and Encinas? Jesus, what good can come from this? Do you know what else sounds like a good decision? Rugby tour 09’ in Hati. This EC really comes as no shock to me. Pett and Encinas collectively have the balanced intelligent decision making prowess of the pet rock my son likes to shove in his diaper. And Seamus? Good lord, if that EC wants to get anything accomplished I hope he brings his trainer with him to blow the whistle and toss him the occasional sardine. At least Hettermann stopped referring to himself in the 3rd person because he doesn’t’ have the charm of tossing used hooker underwear around to make up for it. This really is not shocking though. I’ve found that when left to its own decision making power, 9 times out of 10 a rugby club will make the wrong decision. Shit, I was voted president like 10 times then replaced with Rooney. I still can’t figure out which is dumber. This is what happens when you let rookies have a say in anything. I mean these are guys who couldn’t sing the refrain to a single verse of S&M man on the bus.
ME: OK, this is how it goes, me and Aaron will sing a verse then you sing the refrain. It’s really easy, we’ll pick some classics. Got it? OK, here we go… Who can take a chain saw?!”
GILBERT: “Who?”
ME: “…. can take a chain saw?”
GILBERT: “…………” (blinks eyes)
ME: “OK.. start over…Who can take a chain saw?!”
GILBERT: “Who?”
ME: “... can take a chain saw?”
GILBERT: “…………” (blinks eyes)
ME: (sighs…. considers jumping out of bus). “OK, Look lets try another one, just repeat what I say and do…. Today’s Monday!....”
GILBERT: “Today is Saturday”
ME: Looks left, sees Michael Bryant sipping white wine….“Swanny- let me have a hit of that”
Well maybe not all of the clubs decisions are bad ones because as much as I’m not looking forward to spending more time this year in San Louis Obispo dodging punches from red neck horse fuckers, I sure as hell am happy I won’t be at Stonhurst Park getting chased by livestock and thugs. My new brand of preferred rugby thuggary has grown much more refined. I’ll take leg tattoos over mutton chops any day of the week.
Well, the die is about to be cast and less I leave you without further alienating myself from those who will decide how much fun I have actually plying this year, I’d like to leave you with some clairfications from an excerpt from Dr. Coach Dr. Michael Bryant Ext previous e-mal. Look, if loving too much is a crime I guess I’m guilty. Here you go....
1. He is uber-organized
FACT: Michael alphabetizes the cleaning products in his house and already laid out tomorrow’s outfit. This isn’t that funny because it’s true
2. He is in pretty good shape
FACT: This is why his preferred brand of leisure wear is awkwardly bereft of sleeves.
3. He is anal compulsive:
FACT: To me this sounds like something completely different that I think he meant and frankly a little messy for a guy who cleans both before and after his house keeper comes (also true- once I caught him combing his front yard grass.). I think he meant anal retentive (probablly the oopposite of compulsive) however I think the Freudian slip may have been the most awesome thing he has done. Well played sir.
4. He is demanding
FACT: There is never a point 4.
5. He was a back for most of his rugby career
FACT: When I first read this I thought it said he was Black for most of his rugby career . Of courts would be FALSE.
6. He does not know a lot about forward play
FACT: Ask Michael which is the tight side prop and time his answer.
7. He is pretty stubborn:
FACT: This is why he will never admit to being even slightly amused by this blog.
8. He does not handle alcohol well:
FACT: I once saw Michael Bryant consume his weight in warm beer somewhere in the back woods of Virginia. In perfect baritonee he then proceed to croon for the women folk of the party. We were also drinking moonshine out of a preserves jar and later some dude in a wheel chair helped me escape from a band of local gang members in a place called Hati.
9. He spent a million dollars to make his house look exactly the same:
FACT: It was slightly under 2 million so my first figure of “millions” may have been an exaggeration for effect. Also the roof is slightly a different shade of terracotta so it's not exactally the same.
10. He has pretty thick skin:
FACT: If he sees a fire on the plaines, he will run over and stomp it out.
11. He cares an awful lot about this team:
FACT: Which is why he will often be herd shouting “GO ROCK!”- he knows we are motivated by hate.
OK, see you on the pitch.
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
What Just Happened? - UPDATED UPDATE
I’m having a tough time believing another rugby season has almost past. Although it’s been a little over 6 months of running, for some reason it seems like its just beginning. I can’t shake the feeling that this whole thing is coming to a premature and abrupt end. Maybe it’s because we are finally connecting and playing 1 through 15 with an equal work load. A lot of my discontent comes in looking back at what we gave away and the overwhelming sense that I want it all back. It would be so much easier if we had another 5 matches rather than having to slog through another arid summer of make believe rugby, the slow drudge of a preseason and finally proper 15’s league play where we can find true redemption. Alas, time is a cruel. Unless Wally “The Duke” Johnson can invest some of his valuable time collecting unemployment to devise a time machine, we will have to suffer through these dark months without the benefit of bi-weekly testimonials by the Minister’O’Hate. I can already feel it coming on like a bad hang-over. The discontentment is going to stew. I know I am going to be doing something monotonous like driving down the road or watching another sweet episode of the Wiggles and my sub-consciousness loathing of what we lost will bubble through to the surface and for seeming inexplicable reasons I’ll bolt out “FUCK!”. I truly hate this feeling of un-fulfillment. I want more.
Last night Michael spoke about this past season and in speaking about our W-L record he made reference that there may be some players who are discouraged to the point of moving on to other avenues next year. I don’t think I am alone here in feeling that our record in no way reflects the caliber of rugby we can and have played. In fact there is only one of our opponents who didn’t come out and say as much- Riverside and for all we know they could have said something but none of us speak Islander-dirtbag-speak. Little solace though, the “moral reach-around” is never as much fun as a good hard fucking. "great game guys, you really gave us a run we weren't expecting" or "You played us harder than anyone else this season". Whatever. I’d rather leave our opponents feeling violated, broken and ashamed; hollow… empty inside wondering, why... how go on. Forever burdened with the weight of having theie protective armor of arrogance penetrated by a proper schooling in competitive, structured, disciplined, hard-nosed rugby. As Michael was talking I was rolling through my head thinking of players who may feel affected by the W-L record to the point of bailing. I honestly can’t think of a one and frankly if there are any, who cares. Last night was very apropos and awesome because it was largely Warlords and it is the Warlords who are not only responsible for our ability to field a competitive side but also represent the future of the club. The work rate was as high as it could have been had every member of the starting XV been there. Look, tact has never been my comrade so forgive me for sounding crass. This isn't meant as a cut in any way but for the life of me I don’t know who the fuck Michael was talking to. Sure we may loose some players but I don’t think we’ll loose a single one because of matches lost. In fact I bet we retain players because of those lost matches. I want more and I know I am not the only one… well there might be one...
Maybe it’s because the rugby gods swiped ½ my season from me or maybe it’s because of the reasons listed above or maybe it’s just because I am a whore for the sport. I cherish each second I practice and each second I am gifted with playing a match with the Club and I don't want to give up any of it. I want to hold onto each second like Keegan once clinched the Kit-Kat bar in an Arizona penitentiary as his only means to stave complete emotional and physical collapse from the worlds worse case of DT's. Last night Michael told a story about the SLO match I didn’t know. Apparently in the heat of probably the best match of the season, Za-Za pulled himself out so future Rookie of the Year Matt Encinas could experience the thrill of the moment. This was a match so rich with layers that it is difficult to describe the level of fulfillment every player enjoyed by schooling those douches. So much work, so much pay-back… 6 months all accumulating in that moment. Everything was working, everyone was executing. It was inspired, it was otherworldly, it was a game not many get a chance to play and Za-Za’s instinct was to sacrifice his own moment to share it with a team mate. Look, Za-Za is no spring chicken and with the burdens of work, school, a family and every thing else life throws at him, like me I am sure part of him wonders if each match might be his last. In fact last week he knew full well that it would be his last match with Pasadena this year (family obligations this week)…. and he gave it to a rookie. Fuck. Man, I don’t know that I could do that and frankly I am a little ashamed at my own greed.
Therein is the point. Want more but give more. This is the bastion of the club that has evolved over the last few seasons and it transcends any win-loss record. It is the special sauce… the maroon Kool-Aid that gets us all drunk. It is the reason guys like Za-Za and Wolf make sacrifices to play for Pasadena that many would not. It is the reason that even after 18 years of rugby and over 10 years on this club, I am still humbled by and learning from my team mates. In the end for me it is the reason Michael's words rang hollow. Win-loss record? Seriously? Fuck it. We are just getting started. The best season this club has ever seen is about to pass and another is 6 months away. I can't wait.
UPDATE- Do to certain sensitivities, it has come to our staffs attention the need to point out that NONE of the above ramblings are intended as divisive, subversive or any other ive towards the inspired words of Michael during the previous evenings team discussion and in fact the one reference listed is intended primarily as a literary McGuffin in which to build the point made in the final paragraph. God I hate explaining this. Should you choose to find contempt with any of the fore mentioned sensibilities, you are advised to stop reading and leave the judgment to us. OK, now proceed with the Sloan bashing... except for rookie's, they haven't earned the right to Sloan bash... Tyler however...
UPDATED UPDATE- Fuck the Ghurka's.
Sloan
How many times have you wished you could piss on Sloan? Chances are you already have...
Last night Michael spoke about this past season and in speaking about our W-L record he made reference that there may be some players who are discouraged to the point of moving on to other avenues next year. I don’t think I am alone here in feeling that our record in no way reflects the caliber of rugby we can and have played. In fact there is only one of our opponents who didn’t come out and say as much- Riverside and for all we know they could have said something but none of us speak Islander-dirtbag-speak. Little solace though, the “moral reach-around” is never as much fun as a good hard fucking. "great game guys, you really gave us a run we weren't expecting" or "You played us harder than anyone else this season". Whatever. I’d rather leave our opponents feeling violated, broken and ashamed; hollow… empty inside wondering, why... how go on. Forever burdened with the weight of having theie protective armor of arrogance penetrated by a proper schooling in competitive, structured, disciplined, hard-nosed rugby. As Michael was talking I was rolling through my head thinking of players who may feel affected by the W-L record to the point of bailing. I honestly can’t think of a one and frankly if there are any, who cares. Last night was very apropos and awesome because it was largely Warlords and it is the Warlords who are not only responsible for our ability to field a competitive side but also represent the future of the club. The work rate was as high as it could have been had every member of the starting XV been there. Look, tact has never been my comrade so forgive me for sounding crass. This isn't meant as a cut in any way but for the life of me I don’t know who the fuck Michael was talking to. Sure we may loose some players but I don’t think we’ll loose a single one because of matches lost. In fact I bet we retain players because of those lost matches. I want more and I know I am not the only one… well there might be one...
Maybe it’s because the rugby gods swiped ½ my season from me or maybe it’s because of the reasons listed above or maybe it’s just because I am a whore for the sport. I cherish each second I practice and each second I am gifted with playing a match with the Club and I don't want to give up any of it. I want to hold onto each second like Keegan once clinched the Kit-Kat bar in an Arizona penitentiary as his only means to stave complete emotional and physical collapse from the worlds worse case of DT's. Last night Michael told a story about the SLO match I didn’t know. Apparently in the heat of probably the best match of the season, Za-Za pulled himself out so future Rookie of the Year Matt Encinas could experience the thrill of the moment. This was a match so rich with layers that it is difficult to describe the level of fulfillment every player enjoyed by schooling those douches. So much work, so much pay-back… 6 months all accumulating in that moment. Everything was working, everyone was executing. It was inspired, it was otherworldly, it was a game not many get a chance to play and Za-Za’s instinct was to sacrifice his own moment to share it with a team mate. Look, Za-Za is no spring chicken and with the burdens of work, school, a family and every thing else life throws at him, like me I am sure part of him wonders if each match might be his last. In fact last week he knew full well that it would be his last match with Pasadena this year (family obligations this week)…. and he gave it to a rookie. Fuck. Man, I don’t know that I could do that and frankly I am a little ashamed at my own greed.
Therein is the point. Want more but give more. This is the bastion of the club that has evolved over the last few seasons and it transcends any win-loss record. It is the special sauce… the maroon Kool-Aid that gets us all drunk. It is the reason guys like Za-Za and Wolf make sacrifices to play for Pasadena that many would not. It is the reason that even after 18 years of rugby and over 10 years on this club, I am still humbled by and learning from my team mates. In the end for me it is the reason Michael's words rang hollow. Win-loss record? Seriously? Fuck it. We are just getting started. The best season this club has ever seen is about to pass and another is 6 months away. I can't wait.
UPDATE- Do to certain sensitivities, it has come to our staffs attention the need to point out that NONE of the above ramblings are intended as divisive, subversive or any other ive towards the inspired words of Michael during the previous evenings team discussion and in fact the one reference listed is intended primarily as a literary McGuffin in which to build the point made in the final paragraph. God I hate explaining this. Should you choose to find contempt with any of the fore mentioned sensibilities, you are advised to stop reading and leave the judgment to us. OK, now proceed with the Sloan bashing... except for rookie's, they haven't earned the right to Sloan bash... Tyler however...
UPDATED UPDATE- Fuck the Ghurka's.
Sloan
How many times have you wished you could piss on Sloan? Chances are you already have...
Friday, March 21, 2008
Celebrity Look-alike
OK, it's been a while... Suck It
Mike, have you seen my baseball?
Warren- "There's Something About Mary"
So I Googled the images for "Double Hand Amputee" for another Sloan look-alike and for some inexplicable yet fortuitous and serendipitous reason, this one popped up and it seems to work equally as well...
Sloan
Head Up Ass Dude
Mike, have you seen my baseball?
Warren- "There's Something About Mary"
So I Googled the images for "Double Hand Amputee" for another Sloan look-alike and for some inexplicable yet fortuitous and serendipitous reason, this one popped up and it seems to work equally as well...
Sloan
Head Up Ass Dude
Friday, February 8, 2008
YOU could be next
First Sloan is sidelined with torn labia, now Hornblower strains his kegel... what is happening? This is a vacuum people. Less freaks means someone else… one of YOU will fill the void. We feed on abnormally socially challenged. We require the hearty sustenance that can only be brought through a healthy dosage of mercurial douchebag sniping. I’m not entirely sure what that means but its important people. Avoid the forces of heartless taunts and tactless insults and hope… pray that Hornblower recovers quickly because your name could be here… immortalized for the ages… in space…
I tried to find a less flattering picture of Hornblower but who can fault me for not keeping a horde of Asperger porn.
Hornblower
Jeffery Dahlmer
I tried to find a less flattering picture of Hornblower but who can fault me for not keeping a horde of Asperger porn.
Hornblower
Jeffery Dahlmer
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
11 down, only 19 more to go
Don't feed Sloan after dark... or ask him about the first time he got laid. Both will make you want to lock yourself in the closet with a razor-wire wrapped baseball bat and a bottle of really cheap bourbon.
Sloan
Evil Mogwai
Friday, February 1, 2008
Special Guest Star Celebrity Look-alike
One of our staffers here at T2R reported in that some members of Eagle Rock came accross this blog are upset at some of the inflamatory and seditious comments made here in previous posts regarding ERAC and a few of their members. For those new to the sport and unaware of who I am talking about, Eagle Rock was a former apponent when we were in the dregs of rugby known as SCRFU Division 3. Even before our two clubs were thrust into the rabble of rugby competition, we have had a long history of... spirited competition (Chris Angelica Pasadena Unknown 01/28/2006 Yellow Card). Like our club, ERAC has enjoyed a lot of success over the long history of their club and like ours in years past, they are currently fighting to re-build to their former success. Like our club, EARC has no shortages of personalities. They have some great players who I wouldn't think twice about playing with and in turn, like our club, they have their fair share of doushe bags. It should be noted that 2 of our coaches are former ERAC players (we also have an old OXY player but I'll save that nugget for another post) Why then the history of loathing and detest? Because although many of their players are both skilled on the pitch and gregarious off the pitch, for some awkward reason their sum hole and style of play is that of thuggary dirt bag rugby. They play the game more like a street fight or gangster smack down. I don't know why this is but it is maddening to play against. One common theory is that much of their recruitment comes from troubled youth. I have slandered Caulfield considerably for his performance on the pitch (dude, you are small and old, hang em up) but off the pitch he has dedicated himself to the sport as a ref, coach and administrator. Say what you will about his inability to draft a legible and coherent e-mail that adheres to the very basic rules of grammar and diction, the pony tail and playing rugby in a leotard, but the dude gives a lot back to the sport. Many of their new players spawn from his efforts in the youth development which draws players from some troubled spots of the San Fernando Valley. So is their on-the-pitch prison yard style of play nature or nurture? My father played rugby for L. A. Rugby Club in the 50’s and even he has stories of gangster brutality on the pitch so I submit that it is indeed simply their nature. That is who they are and it’s unfortunate. They have many gifted athletes who, if placed on a team that plays a more disciplined and civilized style of play, would flourish as players and become valuable assets to that club. Maybe they will figure it out or maybe what they’ve got going will work for them. A large part of me wants to see them kick the shit out of the other clubs in Blue so they earn the seed to nationals so that they may see how they need to adapt and change if they want to succeed on a higher level… or maybe they don’t care. Playing ERAC has always been fun, even if entirely maddening. I’d like to see them move up- Riverside, Kern AND Eagle Rock? Magic.
Look, this is all really just filling to get to the point of this post. The following player has put me on my ass more times than I can count and in a different universe he would have made a great member to our club. Unfortunately for his club his blood lust often comes at the sake of his team because he’d rather make the big hit rather than follow the play or run through someone rather than into the gap or make a pass to a supporting player. Sure as the sun will rise or Wally will go back for 3rds at the all you can keep down buffet line at Sizzler, JP will opt to inflect pain rather than propperly progress the ball up field. Like many, myself included, he should have hung the boots up long ago. I’m glad he hasn’t because he is so much fun to get a rise out of. Keep it going JP… just one more year old man… one more year.
Look, this is all really just filling to get to the point of this post. The following player has put me on my ass more times than I can count and in a different universe he would have made a great member to our club. Unfortunately for his club his blood lust often comes at the sake of his team because he’d rather make the big hit rather than follow the play or run through someone rather than into the gap or make a pass to a supporting player. Sure as the sun will rise or Wally will go back for 3rds at the all you can keep down buffet line at Sizzler, JP will opt to inflect pain rather than propperly progress the ball up field. Like many, myself included, he should have hung the boots up long ago. I’m glad he hasn’t because he is so much fun to get a rise out of. Keep it going JP… just one more year old man… one more year.
Enjoy!
JP
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