John-John
Mario Lopez
Rock Dennis on the other hand may be a clear violation of our policy as he clearly has the upper hand on Pett.
Dave Pett
Rocky Dennis
Friday, December 14, 2007
Celebrity Look-alike
Typically our policy for look-alikes is "nothing flattering". Only because Mario Lopez is a cheeze dick is this acceptable.
Nothing is Sacred- Welcome to the Club
As hard ass as this guy is, let us not forget that the number on his jersey is a double digit and thus his propensity for glam should not be discounted. I tried really hard to find the gayest picture I could... welcome to the club bro.
Wolf
That dude from American Idol
In other news, Cheesburger re-immerged last night looking... healthy. I copped a feel of his man tits and I actually got a 1/2 chub... akward.
Celebrity Look-alike
Sloan
Sloan Celebrity Look Alike #8: Baboon Ass
Again some disagreement amongst the staff here at The Front Row. Some thought Jack from "Lost" was a keen look alike, some couldn't see it. What we could all agree on was a) that Jack from "Lost" is way too flattering and b) this kid is MUCH more fitting. Enjoy!
Our venerable leader Keegan
The inbred banjo playing kid from "Deliverance"
Definitions
in·sult
a. To treat with gross insensitivity, insolence, or contemptuous rudeness. See Synonyms at offend.
b. To affront or demean: an absurd speech that insulted the intelligence of the audience.2. Obsolete To make an attack on.
v.intr. Archaic
1. To behave arrogantly.
2. To give offense; offend: a speech that was intended to insult.
n. ( n s lt )
1. An offensive action or remark.
2. a. Medicine A bodily injury, irritation, or trauma.b. Something that causes bodily injury, irritation, or trauma: "the middle of the Bronx, buffeted and poisoned by the worst environmental insults that urban America can dish out" William K. Stevens.
Insult
From Wikipedia
An insult is an expression, statement or behavior that is considered offensive, rude or degrading. Insults may be intentional or accidental. An example of the latter is a well-intended simple explanation, which in fact is superfluous, but is given due to underestimating intelligence or knowledge of the other.Whether speech or behavior is insulting, in practice and sometimes by the terms of local assault statutes, is often a product of the subjective sense of the person insulted. But insults to one person who might not mind the derogatory speech may indirectly insult others. Many states and local municipalities enforce prohibitions against rude, offensive or insulting speech, leaving citizens, law enforcement officers and courts to decide what is and what is not an insult. The concept of fighting words as a form of prohibited speech has developed in the jurisprudence of U.S. constitutional law concerning terms of disparagement. But insults offered as satire in an artistic venue, such as a novel, a film or a song, are usually regarded as protected speech, especially in the United States.The role of insults in the social sense may be better understood by an appreciation of how the term is used in a medical setting. Though a popular idiom refers to "adding insult to injury," in a medical context they are the same. Physicians examine injuries resulting from an insult to flesh and bones, caused by various traumatic events. In speech and in social settings, insults are words that tend to injure the psyche. In humor, insults may be exchanged in much the way fighters exchange blows in training, to develop a resistance to the pain of mild injuries, or to spar with no real intention of seriously injuring the other.
sat·ire
Pronunciation:\ˈsa-ˌtī(-ə)r\
Function:noun
Etymology:Middle French or Latin; Middle French, from Latin satura, satira, perhaps from (lanx) satura dish of mixed ingredients, from feminine of satur well-fed; akin to Latin satis enough —Date:15011 :
a literary work holding up human vices and follies to ridicule or scorn
2 : trenchant wit, irony, or sarcasm used to expose and discredit vice or folly. Satire is strictly a literary genre, although it is found in the graphic and performing arts as well as the printed word. In satire, human or individual vices, follies, abuses, or shortcomings are held up to censure by means of ridicule, derision, burlesque, irony, or other methods, ideally with an intent to bring about improvement.[1]
Although satire is usually meant to be funny, the purpose of satire is not primarily humour in itself so much as an often quite angry attack on something the author strongly disapproves, using the weapon of wit.A very common, almost defining feature of satire is a strong vein of irony or sarcasm, but parody, burlesque, exaggeration, juxtaposition, comparison, analogy, and double entendre are all frequently used in satirical speech and writing. The essential point, however, is that "in satire, irony is militant"[2]. This "militant irony" (or sarcasm) often professes to approve the very things the satirist actually wishes to attack.
I'm sure you can figure it out. If not maybe you can blame your parents. If it's still a problem, then maybe you should stop reading and spend more time on some self affirmations.
a. To treat with gross insensitivity, insolence, or contemptuous rudeness. See Synonyms at offend.
b. To affront or demean: an absurd speech that insulted the intelligence of the audience.2. Obsolete To make an attack on.
v.intr. Archaic
1. To behave arrogantly.
2. To give offense; offend: a speech that was intended to insult.
n. ( n s lt )
1. An offensive action or remark.
2. a. Medicine A bodily injury, irritation, or trauma.b. Something that causes bodily injury, irritation, or trauma: "the middle of the Bronx, buffeted and poisoned by the worst environmental insults that urban America can dish out" William K. Stevens.
Insult
From Wikipedia
An insult is an expression, statement or behavior that is considered offensive, rude or degrading. Insults may be intentional or accidental. An example of the latter is a well-intended simple explanation, which in fact is superfluous, but is given due to underestimating intelligence or knowledge of the other.Whether speech or behavior is insulting, in practice and sometimes by the terms of local assault statutes, is often a product of the subjective sense of the person insulted. But insults to one person who might not mind the derogatory speech may indirectly insult others. Many states and local municipalities enforce prohibitions against rude, offensive or insulting speech, leaving citizens, law enforcement officers and courts to decide what is and what is not an insult. The concept of fighting words as a form of prohibited speech has developed in the jurisprudence of U.S. constitutional law concerning terms of disparagement. But insults offered as satire in an artistic venue, such as a novel, a film or a song, are usually regarded as protected speech, especially in the United States.The role of insults in the social sense may be better understood by an appreciation of how the term is used in a medical setting. Though a popular idiom refers to "adding insult to injury," in a medical context they are the same. Physicians examine injuries resulting from an insult to flesh and bones, caused by various traumatic events. In speech and in social settings, insults are words that tend to injure the psyche. In humor, insults may be exchanged in much the way fighters exchange blows in training, to develop a resistance to the pain of mild injuries, or to spar with no real intention of seriously injuring the other.
sat·ire
Pronunciation:\ˈsa-ˌtī(-ə)r\
Function:noun
Etymology:Middle French or Latin; Middle French, from Latin satura, satira, perhaps from (lanx) satura dish of mixed ingredients, from feminine of satur well-fed; akin to Latin satis enough —Date:15011 :
a literary work holding up human vices and follies to ridicule or scorn
2 : trenchant wit, irony, or sarcasm used to expose and discredit vice or folly. Satire is strictly a literary genre, although it is found in the graphic and performing arts as well as the printed word. In satire, human or individual vices, follies, abuses, or shortcomings are held up to censure by means of ridicule, derision, burlesque, irony, or other methods, ideally with an intent to bring about improvement.[1]
Although satire is usually meant to be funny, the purpose of satire is not primarily humour in itself so much as an often quite angry attack on something the author strongly disapproves, using the weapon of wit.A very common, almost defining feature of satire is a strong vein of irony or sarcasm, but parody, burlesque, exaggeration, juxtaposition, comparison, analogy, and double entendre are all frequently used in satirical speech and writing. The essential point, however, is that "in satire, irony is militant"[2]. This "militant irony" (or sarcasm) often professes to approve the very things the satirist actually wishes to attack.
I'm sure you can figure it out. If not maybe you can blame your parents. If it's still a problem, then maybe you should stop reading and spend more time on some self affirmations.
Monday, December 3, 2007
Celebrity Look-alikes
There was some disagreement here with the staff of The 2nd Row as to which of these most resembled Coach Catchless so we'll post both
Tim
Don Knotts
Also when I asked Sloan what he thought about the week of celebrity look-alikes he said the thought he got a whole month because he was "player of the month". Clearly he is unfamiliar with how we do things here. But since he is fond of looking a gift horse in the mouth, I will honor his request and grant him further look-alikes. But for the sake of devoting too much internet space and your time in having to look at his ugly mug, the remaining 23 installments will be made over time... a very long ass time. This is going to be awesome.
Sloan
Sloan Celebrity Look-Alike #8: Douche Bag
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